Groceries

Jack stood in the infimary, watching the nurse at Daniel's bedside. Daniel was being quiet and cooperative -- a sharp contrast from two hours ago when they'd brought him in here. Jack figured it was the cast that made the difference. Now that every jostle and movement wasn't causing exuriating pain, Daniel could relax and stop yelling at the medical staff.

Jack hoped that was the case -- he didn't want to find out that Daniel was merely being polite so Dr. Fraiser would release him early. As the nurse walked away, Jack moved forward. Daniel saw him, and smiled. Jack loved that smile. He couldn't help but return
it.

"So. They tell me you're outta here tomorrow?" Jack said.

"It's just a broken arm, Jack. Despite how it looked."

"Yeah, well, it *looked* like we were gonna have to issue you a new one. Don't do that again, OK, Danny?"

"I'll try not to," he replied with a tone of tolerance. Jack couldn't blame him -- last time *he'd* been the one getting bandaged up, and Daniel had been the one scolding him.

"So. Is there anything I can do for you?"

Daniel gave him a soft version of his anthropologist-puppy-eyes look. Jack steeled himself to resist. Daniel said, "I'd like to start making some notes from our stay on PT193. Obviously I can't use a keyboard," he indicated the arm resting in its sling. "But I can make some notes longhand if I had a pad of paper."

"And Doc Fraiser said this would be OK?" Jack knew he had every right to be paranoid. Last time he'd brought Daniel his work, Fraiser had threatened to lock Jack out of the infirmary for a day, so Daniel
could rest as prescribed.

"Jack--"

"Uh-huh. Why don't I go ask her if you're allowed to get any work done while you're here?"

Daniel gave him a dirty look, but let him go. That told Jack that it was probably all right, but he asked, regardless.

He ended up bringing a pad of paper, three pencils, and Daniel's handheld tape recorder. As he handed it over to Daniel he asked the enxt question quickly, knowing that it was probably already too late to get Daniel's full attention. "You need anything else?"

Daniel shook his head, arranging everything on the swivel table the nurse had brought over. "Oh!" He looked up at a sudden thought. "Are you going home tonight? I mean, you're not staying here? I thought I heard someone saying--"

"Yeah, I had planned on it. We've been gone for two weeks and I figured I could spent the evening making the place livable again."

"I wonder if I could ask you to do me a favour?" The anthropologist-eyes were back, making Daniel look cute and pleading and helpless.

Jack scowled at him. "What?"

"Well, when we left we knew we'd probably be gone awhile..."

"Uh-huh," Jack prompted, when Daniel stopped. "And?"

"So I cleaned out the refrigerator. Everything perishable, that is. Janet said that Nurse Anderson would be able to give me a ride home in the morning but I hate to ask her to stop on the way so I was wondering if you could come back in the morning and--"

Jack held up a hand. "You have a list? I'll go tonight."

"Really?"

"Really. I need food, myself. List?" He made a 'gimmie' gesture with his hand, and Daniel picked up the pencil.

"Oh, wait... I've already got one I think." He checked the tapes Jack had brought with the recorder; he hadn't know which were blank or re-usable, so he'd brought all four that had been sitting with the player. "Here, it's on this one."

Jack took the tape. "You wanna transcribe it for me?"

"There's another recorder in my desk," Daniel told him -- he was staring at the pad of paper, and already beginning to scribble a few notes.

Jack knew he'd lost him, and considered saying something else to tease him about the fact. But Daniel wasn't paying attention.

Jack just nodded, and left.

He did manage to cajole Sam into giving him a hand. She needed a ride home, so Jack had gladly offered her one -- not mentioning until too late that he had the errand to run. She'd just grinned and offered no objections.

When they arrived at the market closest to Daniel's place, Jack realised he'd grabbed the tape and recorder, but hadn't transcribed the list. That was all right, he figured. He grabbed both, and headed inside.

Sam grabbed a cart, and they headed for the produce section. "It's either in exact order, or completely out of order," Jack said. "Wanna make a bet?"

Sam shook her head. "Could go either way. Hit it."

Jack nodded, and hit the 'play' button.

"Get bread." Daniel's voice said. Jack grinned, and pointed at the bread aisle which was in front of them. "Not that name brand whole wheat kind, either," Daniel continued. Jack and Sam exchanged amused looks, and headed for the array of bread. "Try the deli, or look for a local bakery. Something that doesn't use some form of sugar to disquise the taste of flour. Bread is *supposed* to taste like flour. That's what it's *made* from."

Jack and Sam had to stifle their laughter. "Leave it to Danny to babble even to *himself*," Jack said. The tape had been intended for Daniel's use, though Jack had to admit he appreciated the details instructions for selecting the right kind of bread.

He let Sam grab a loaf, shrugging when she held it up for his inspection. She dropped it in the cart as Daniel's voice was continuing. "That reminds me, I need to buy something for our meeting. Bagels, or scones. I wonder if the grocery store has them or if I'll have to go to Addymans?"

Jack and Sam looked around. "Over there," Sam pointed. Jack hit the 'pause' button as they made their way over. "How many?" she asked.

"I think there's seven of them. If he's talking about the meeting he has with the other eggheads."

Sam gave him an almost dirty look -- as dirty as a subordinate officer could do, off-duty and out of uniform.

"OK, OK," Jack relented. "It's not an insult, by the way."

She just grabbed a bag of bagels and added it to the cart. Jack switched off the 'pause'.

"Ummm... pears. Or something. I wonder what's fresh? Well I suppose it depends on when I get to the store. Could be a month from now."

Jack could picture Daniel's expression as he spoke, and once again had to stifle a laugh. They headed over to the fruit section.

The next few items were listed together, without commentary. Jack was growing hopeful that it would remain so, when Daniel listed the next.

"I wonder if they have any of those orange milanos? Had to give the mint ones to Teal'c -- it's a good thing he'll eat anything, I think. Though he said he liked them. I don't recall seeing orange, but I'll have to check again. I suppose I could just get more oreos but they really taste artificial."

When Jack hit 'pause', Sam pointed out that the cookies were five rows down.

Jack got Daniel three bags of orange Milanos, raising an eyebrow at Sam's surprise and explaining that they were small bags.

"I think I need more couscous," was Daniel's next item. It was back two rows -- they were definitely not going in order. Jack and Sam headed back for the grain, and picked up the boxes of pasta Daniel had listed next.

Then, "I'm out of tea. I swear I don't understand it -- I hardly ever drink the stuff. Jack swears he doesn't like the herbals, but ever since he's been staying over the tea has been disappearing at a much faster rate."

With a cool, undisturbed expression, Jack headed for the coffee and tea aisle. Sam followed, a surprised grin on her face. Jack ignored her and picked out a couple of boxes of tea. Herbals, and ones he liked.

He continued to ignore Sam's grin.

"And more coffee."

Jack picked up a bag of Daniel's preferred blend.

"And condoms."

Jack dropped the coffee. Sam burst into laughter. He considered switching off the recorder and getting the rest of the groceries later, then he realised the worst was probably already over.

He did have to glare Sam down from making any comments as they headed for the pharmacy area. He wanted to say "at least we use them," but technically he wasn't supposed to admit to anything. Even if Sam obviously knew -- she peered over his shoulder, asking, "Is that the right size?"

"Major -- don't make me reassign you to SG13."

SG13 didn't travel through the Stargate. It was support staff, and temporarily disabled SG team members. The duty was important, but mostly boring as hell. Sam just smiled.

Jack hit 'play' again.

"Oh, and more cool whip. I can't believe he--" Jack hit 'stop'. He fast-forwarded a bit, and hit 'play' again.

Sam was looking at him, her eyes wide. "*Cool whip*?"

Daniel's voice continued, "and the way he moa--" Jack hit 'stop' again.

"I think we've got enough. He can buy the rest of it later. Come on." Jack stepped past Sam, heading for the cashiers.

Sam followed, smirking. She continued smirking as the cashier rang up the groceries, as Jack handed over the money, and as he hefted both sacks to carry them out.

She was quiet, however, until Jack pulled out of the parking lot. "Cool whip?"

Jack glanced over. "If I hear *one* word of this, anytime, anywhere -- but especially from any other member of SGC I will have you sharpening pencils for Cluderson. Clear?"

He figured his threat hadn't worked, when she just laughed. He knew she wouldn't say anything, but he hoped she would at least--

"You know," she said thoughtfully. "That explains what Teal'c meant before we left, when he said you were delayed because you needed a new uniform before we could gate out. He'd said you were sticky--"

"Major!"